Does This Look Like The Slider of Baseball’s First $200 Million Pitcher?



After reading a majestic article in which Magic Johnson albeit guaranteed Kershaw a contract of at least $200 million, I heard today that because of those comments negotiations have been heating up and some executives are thinking more in the $220 million + range.  Is this smart?

Recent extensions of Verlander (5 years $180 mil) and Felix Hernandez (7, $175) have set the standard for the market as they are obviously two legitimate aces.  How does Kershaw differ? Easy, he’s just 25.  By locking him up now, the Dodgers are paying for his prime years, and a few years of decline.  The Tigers locked up Verlander through the end of his prime, and well into decline, and the Mariners will also see much of Felix’s decline stage.  For once, I think The Dodgers actually aren’t recklessly spending.

Stats show that these guys are pretty equally as dominant.  All three have Cy Young awards, all three are historically durable, and all three have great stuff.  Kershaw has young age, and being a lefty on his side here and I think the risk is completely worth the return in signing him to a big deal.  Plus I just read that he is a relative of the dude who discovered the planet Pluto (RIP).  That to me is almost worth $100 million right there so this deal is seriously looking like a bargain.

oh and here’s one more little breaking ball gif to keep you happy.


Got Heem



EDIT: My Cousin Lazy Cat just brought this to my attention…Who’s curve buckled the batter worse? Either way, Got Heeeeeem.



Tom Wilhelmsen


Brian Harper Taking Us Into The New Season


Brian Harper was ahead of his time


Just wanted to get the blog started off with a bang.  Is this the mustache of the week you ask? Frankly, no.  I’m cooking up something a little better for you guys.

Now really quickly I want to address a few things about this most legendary photo.  Who is Brian Harper (No relation to Bryce) talking to on the phone?  My guess is his agent.  What are they discussing? Any number of things, but my bet is on his career .329 OBP including his stellar .200 mark he reached in 1986.


Bravo Brian, the best thing you accomplished during your storied career was owning that legendary Cell Phone.  All jokes aside, I would totally use this.

Just Like Arnold In The Terminator….



I’m baaaaaaaack.


I know, I know…Everyone is wondering where I’ve been.  The rumors have been swirling.  Am I dead? Did I get knocked up?  Did I take the millions I’ve made from blogging and retreat to a beautiful tropical land with a bombshell on my side.  The answer to all of the above is of course, no.  I simply took a small hiatus from baseball after I nearly fell into a deep depression brought on by a combination of Bobby Valentine, AAAA players in the bigs, and school work.


Now that we’re all on the same page, let’s move on.  It’s a new season and oh my we are off to a great start.  Expect new updates on the regular, and maybe a few guest posts from a good friend of mine, Lil Cat.


I know you all missed me so much, so let the games begin.


Bobcat Jeffries

Jim Joyce, Wally Bell: Respective Living Legends


I’ve been doing this thing lately where every time I go to the sox game, I lookup the umpiring crew and pick out one who seems most legendary, and proceed to chat them up the whole game.  You see, my best friend and dear cousin, Buster Pujols, has season tickets to the Sox right on the third base line, so this is quite the common occurrence.

The two most memorable had to be Jim “Big Daddy Smooth” Joyce, and Wally “RedWood” Bell.  Yes, I completely fabricated those nicknames.

Long Story short, I was reminiscing about my short, but beautiful, interactions with my two umpire homies, and I got to thinking.  If I troll the inter-web long enough, I’m sure I can find some albeit amazing vids of ridiculous umpire calls.  Then I stumbled on this gold mine.

At first I thought this dude was semi-annoying. And then BOOM. Big Papa busts out moves I haven’t seen since the Thriller music video.


There’s a ton of these on youtube. They’re so entertaining I don’t even know how I’m going to bed tonight.  Check this dude out.



I’m sorry…was that the Macarena? Takes pure guts to flaunt this much as an ump.  Real grit just to take all the attention off the kids and place it upon yourself.  Power move, Ump.  That’s how you command respect.

Slow day for analysis and such in case you couldn’t tell, keep checking back for posts on the daily though kids.

As always,


Oh and here’s one more that I really shouldn’t include considering it is softball, but whatever. It’s not everyday Bruce Lee comes back from the nether regions to call a game.  In Hawaii no less.


Ignorance/The World Is Flat

I’m Fat

“Why the boring title Bobcat?”  I know I know. All my article titles are normally straight fire but today I’m sullen and downtrodden to say the least.  My precious Red Sox made two moves that seem boneheaded unless they make some waiver wire moves in August to remedy the situation.

So I’m writing this currently because I was recently in a discussion with someone who said they heard a bunch of people discussing the distinct possibility of Slosh Beckett being traded today.  Now this didn’t happen nor was it ever a real possibility.  Let’s just think about this for a second.

108.1 IP, 6.81 K/9 , 2.41 BB.9 , 0.75 HR/9 , .299 BABIP, 4.57 ERA, 3.53 FIP, 4.04 xFIP, 2.5 WAR

This guy is hardly even replacement level let alone worth 37.5 million bucks over the next few years.  No GM other then Steve Philips when he was with the Mets would take on this guy, his bloated contract, and his penchant for fried chicken and beer.

Leading me to the second half of my rant.  I get very persnickety with things like this.  Back in the day when people believed the world was flat, everyone took it as gospel.  When people started saying “Hey, you can’t fall off the edge you douchelords, the Earth is round” there was an uproar from traditionalists and mass hysteria.  The same thing is occurring within baseball as we speak.  Guys are coming out and saying “Yo there’s better ways to look at the business aspect of baseball then we have in the past, we have these new fangled statistics, sabermetrics if you will, they tell us all sorts of cool shit like how to truly value players and not just go off good ol’ hard nosed judgement from scouts like we’ve always done”.  The aforementioned traditionalists are freaking out and claiming we’re all nerds who sit behind computers and analyze stats and don’t actually watch the games.  Anyways, if these guys had taken a step back, taken a look at and realized he’s hardly even replacement level, then I probably wouldn’t have to make them look stupid right now.So back to the discussion I was having.  After I dismissed the idea of being able to dump Becks as pure stupidity, the person said “Well the radio was saying it”.  Right, I’m sure the Boston papers were saying it too.  The only guy in the media who isn’t a total titnose is Peter Gammons.  Other than that I dismiss all those guys as speculators, or men who’s ideals and perceptions about how to run a baseball team are so elementary, they shouldn’t be allowed near the sports section let alone write for one.

Times are a changin.  People, get with the program please.  Educate yourselves, be informed baseball fans.  Just be informed people in general.

P.S. this same Boston media also has speculated that Jonny Lester would be traded for weeks.  Today it was revealed that teams were asking about him and Boston front office was “saying flatly no” to teams.  Real smart those reporters huh?

Im pissed,

RantCat Jeffries

EDIT 7:10 : I should note that it would not be absurd for anyone, no matter how gluttonous the contract, should the side trading that player be willing to throw in cash, in this case it would have to be millions of dollars.  It is well documented this season that the Red Sox are trying to cut costs due to the massive contracts of Carl Crawford, Adrian Gonzales and co. therefore that is why my stance is so strong on Josh Beckett never being a real trade candidate (atleast until the waiver wire opens up).

EDIT #2 7:31 PM: “Red Sox GM Ben Cherington said he didn’t ask  Josh Beckett if he’d waive his ten and five rights, according to Brian MacPherson of the Providence Journal ”  (If you’d like to read the non-paraphrased tweet click the link)

I don’t wanna be that guy, so this is the last update.  But what can I say? I win.

Adrian Beltre Is One Weird Cat

I dont know if you guys know anything about this dude, but I remember when he was playing with the Sox the clubhouse was abuzz because they found out that Beltre’s biggest fear, absolute biggest fear, is being touched on his head.  Ghosts? no way. Dragons? Don’t exist. Lightning? Plane Crashes? Adrian don’t give a shit. But if you touch him on his head, i hear he has quite the little temper.

Anyways I thought this was hilarious when I was watching the game the other night and this happened.

Irony at it’s best.  Poetic Justice.

PS hard to imagine the man who’s scared of being touched on his head, is the same bro that’s signature move is hitting a goddamn bomb from one knee.

Stay Weird kids.

EDIT: Just found this page literally dedicated to GIF’s of Beltre’s reactions to being touched on his head. This dude is Brian Wilson Batshit Crazy. Seriously give this a click, it’s hilarious.  I’ve never seen a team in cahoots together plotting to touch a man’s head.

and here’s one just because Beltre is insane


click the picture to view it as a GIF

Oh Tito I Loved Your Ways, Everyday


Thanks to beyond the boxscore for this graph- just wanted readers to take a look at a couple of things here.

1. I miss Tito Francona so much, Bobby V is a douchebag.

2. Youk obviously kills this statistic (Wins Above Replacement) thus confirming his nickname “the Greek Beard Of Walks”

3. I am astonished that Hideki “Okee dokee” Okajima cracked this list.  No doubt he had some great set up years but I had no clue he was this effective.

4. I need Dr. Creepy John Henry to bring back Tito Francona so we can get back to our winning ways, and beautiful gems like these


Although I gotta give Bobby V some love for this doozy.