Does Getting a $100+ Million Contract Entitle Someone

to rock the greatest mustache we’ll see this season?

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Daddy’s Feelin Delicios

I know I know…it’s a week in, calm down Bobcat.  No way, this shit is unreal.   Cole woke up that morning and said “Fuck the world, I just got filthy rich.  Daddy’s feelin pretty delicious, probably gonna pipe a few heaters down the middle today and still strike everyone out.  I’m a dirty dog, and I’m gonna rock a Dirty Stache”.

Goose Gossage his shitting his pants right now, wondering if the crown of Greatest Stache’ may be threatened.  If Cole keeps this up, Goose should be shaking in his boots.

And one more (in no way suggestive) picture just for funsies.  I’m pretty sure that’s a hot dog cannon. No words.

 

Safe to say mustache of the week is in the bag.

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A cannon like this can only to be used by dirty dogs

 

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Bro-Stache’ Of The Week Is In!

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Best Career Move of Pavano hands down.  Literally just a game changer.  I know Kawasaki had the whole Dojo Sensai thing going on with his pencil stache’ but this….. This is an homage’ to the men who paved the way in 1980’s Porn so Pavano could rock the shit out of this little puppy today.  Well played sir, and touche’.

EDIT: I don’t think we’ve ever seen focus like this before from Hot Carl.  Literally ever.  That’s the look of a man who’s thinkin bout doin somethin bad.  Is it the Stache’? That’s a clown question bro.


Bro-stache’ of the Week Award

In honor of my beautifully renamed blog, catch a glimpse of this little lip caterpillar.  Oh my! If he doesn’t give not 1, not 2, not 3, not 4, not 5, but 6 mustache rides per day on that bad mamma jamma, he’s not doing it right. Atta boy!

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Wait no that’s just Seattle’s Bat Boy. Huh, what’s that? No, no I’m receiving word this guy does actually play for the Mariners.

Wow, I didn’t know we let his kind in the league.  And no, I’m not referring to his race, creed, gender, sex, sexual preference, shoe size, small stature, or anything else distinctive about him.  Here at Baseball Brospectus, we’re tolerant of others.  I’m simply referring to his pencil stache’ growing abilities.  One would think he could find great work in another industry, work that brings honor to his family.  Perhaps working at a Dojo or something.  I’d be tolerant of that.  See, told you I was tolerant.

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HIYAAAA!

TolerantCat Jeffries


How great was Rollie Finger’s stache’?

How great was Rollie Finger's stache'?

My only question is, how much mustache wax did it take to keep this bad boy aloof?