Kawasaki Is Officially A Legend

So our last week’s bro-stache’ award recipient just continues to prove to all of us his unbelievable boss status.  I mean if anyone has life  figured out it’s this guy. Just week in, week out, showing us how it’s done. (click for the GIFS in action, I promise, it’s worth it)

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and yes, he dances too

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Salt in the wound Sensai, salt in the wound.

Anyways, sorry for the lack of posting guys, I’m staying busy these days but lots of goodies to come soon

Let’s get peculiar,

GrasshoppaCat Jeffries

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Adrian Beltre Is One Weird Cat

I dont know if you guys know anything about this dude, but I remember when he was playing with the Sox the clubhouse was abuzz because they found out that Beltre’s biggest fear, absolute biggest fear, is being touched on his head.  Ghosts? no way. Dragons? Don’t exist. Lightning? Plane Crashes? Adrian don’t give a shit. But if you touch him on his head, i hear he has quite the little temper.

Anyways I thought this was hilarious when I was watching the game the other night and this happened.

Irony at it’s best.  Poetic Justice.

PS hard to imagine the man who’s scared of being touched on his head, is the same bro that’s signature move is hitting a goddamn bomb from one knee.

Stay Weird kids.

EDIT: Just found this page literally dedicated to GIF’s of Beltre’s reactions to being touched on his head. This dude is Brian Wilson Batshit Crazy. Seriously give this a click, it’s hilarious.  I’ve never seen a team in cahoots together plotting to touch a man’s head.

http://bosoxgifs.imgur.com/beltre_head_rubs/

and here’s one just because Beltre is insane

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click the picture to view it as a GIF


Gotta Flaunt This One A Little

So this has absolutely, and i mean absolutely, nothing to do with baseball but sometimes you guys gotta let Ol’ Bobcat brag a little bit. This list just came out for Colleges with the sexiest student bodies in the nation.  I was shocked not in the least bit suprised when my own Alma Mater, Elon University made the cut. #23 right there. See for yourselves.

http://www.fiestafrog.com/blog/index.php/top-25-colleges-sexiest-hottest-student-body/

Now I know don’t wanna say this is only because of myself, but one thing is for certain. It sure ain’t because of this guy.

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“Im just buzzed guys”

Hey. If the Big Cat says he’s just buzzed, then that’s it. Big Cat don’t play no shit.

I personally think this kid is bombed, but let’s let supple be supple and just go with his story and act like he was just buzzed.  Either way, this picture/blog post (once I make it big time and get noticed) alone will probably be the reason that Elon gets taken off the sexiest list faster then fuck.

Big Cat was bombed off Dat Moonshine,

Larry SaucedCat Jeffries

EDIT 11:03 PM: BREAKING NEWS- I just heard from a very reliable inside source that on the night of this list ruining picture, the Big Cat was last seen leaving the bar with a woman (not pictured) rumored to have crabs.  Inside sources reported as recently as last week he was being treated for what is being called an “unprecedented severe case of ‘the itch’ “.


Oh Tito I Loved Your Ways, Everyday

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Thanks to beyond the boxscore for this graph- just wanted readers to take a look at a couple of things here.

1. I miss Tito Francona so much, Bobby V is a douchebag.

2. Youk obviously kills this statistic (Wins Above Replacement) thus confirming his nickname “the Greek Beard Of Walks”

3. I am astonished that Hideki “Okee dokee” Okajima cracked this list.  No doubt he had some great set up years but I had no clue he was this effective.

4. I need Dr. Creepy John Henry to bring back Tito Francona so we can get back to our winning ways, and beautiful gems like these

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Although I gotta give Bobby V some love for this doozy.


Let’s Balk This Out

So I’m not sure if you guys saw Franklin Morales commit this beautiful balk the other day against the Rays, so here it is again

(You have to click the GIF’s to view them)

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As comical and sad as this “pickoff” throw is, there’s a lot more going on here that meets the eye.  Take a peek above the “R” in the Crown ad in top left of the picture.  Find Big Momma Smooth in the blue shirt, and notice that she peeks around with timing so perfect that she actually misses the whole play.  First she’s watching First, then she’s watching towards third base…congrats

Although I’m pretty sure she wasn’t watching Third Base, I think she was staring at this big dog killin the dance floor    seat dancing game. (Look above the US Trust Sign on the third base side, more specifically right above the ‘RAYS’ in small lettering.

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I haven’t seen moves like those since Tom turned gay in Brazil that one year

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And yes, I did try and see how many GIF’s I could fit into one post.

PS- Yeah, I know the title is a prime piece of Pun.  Some say my Dad is the King of puns, but I think slowly but surely im trundlin’ on up to his level.  Either way the title is Ca$h Money. Don’t Hate.

Hoonyocker,

Larry PunCat Jeffries

 

-Shoutout to M. Kory at Baseball Prospectus for bringing the Morales GIF’s to my attention.


I Simply Couldn’t Resist

So I was trolling the internet per usual for smut blog material and found this little nugget of wisdomImage

Now I’m conflicted.  I always thought this was the greatest meme picture ever of a small African Child.

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Now I have a serious internal conflict that rivals Pocohontas contemplating marrying that white devil John Smith.  This is completely flipping my world upside down. Someone help. Please.

Larry ConfusedCat Jeffries


I Knew You Guys Couldn’t Live Without Me

Well, well, well.  We meet again folks.  Imagine my surprise to return home from a weekend full of crazy sex, drugs, booze, smokin’ jeffries, smokin stogies, and kickin’ it with the bros to discover the blog is still alive and kickin’ it.  Really proud to know my loyal readers continued checking back in for my smut posting.  Preciate’ it guys.  I have an actual post coming later this evening, but I just wanted to bust this one out and let you guys know that I did in fact survive and am goin’ strong.

I want to leave you guys with this little gem of a picture to sum up weekend.

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P.S.  Uncle T- The “weekend full of crazy sex, drugs…etc” was hyperbole.  Don’t worry, nothing unwholesome was taking place under your roof.