Just wanted to get the blog started off with a bang. Is this the mustache of the week you ask? Frankly, no. I’m cooking up something a little better for you guys.
Now really quickly I want to address a few things about this most legendary photo. Who is Brian Harper (No relation to Bryce) talking to on the phone? My guess is his agent. What are they discussing? Any number of things, but my bet is on his career .329 OBP including his stellar .200 mark he reached in 1986.
Bravo Brian, the best thing you accomplished during your storied career was owning that legendary Cell Phone. All jokes aside, I would totally use this.
In honor of my beautifully renamed blog, catch a glimpse of this little lip caterpillar. Oh my! If he doesn’t give not 1, not 2, not 3, not 4, not 5, but 6 mustache rides per day on that bad mamma jamma, he’s not doing it right. Atta boy!
Wait no that’s just Seattle’s Bat Boy. Huh, what’s that? No, no I’m receiving word this guy does actually play for the Mariners.
Wow, I didn’t know we let his kind in the league. And no, I’m not referring to his race, creed, gender, sex, sexual preference, shoe size, small stature, or anything else distinctive about him. Here at Baseball Brospectus, we’re tolerant of others. I’m simply referring to his pencil stache’ growing abilities. One would think he could find great work in another industry, work that brings honor to his family. Perhaps working at a Dojo or something. I’d be tolerant of that. See, told you I was tolerant.